8 Wedding Music Mistakes and How To Avoid Them

There are so many details to take care of when planning a wedding, and lots of room for things to fall through the cracks. You want your day to be perfect, and music sets the scene for your special ceremony and reception. Here are some wedding music tips to ensure your music hits all the right notes on your big day, and the top eight things to avoid:

1. Don’t hire musicians to play solely for the ceremony.

Musicians are versatile, so make sure to get the best bang for your buck. If you only hire musicians to play for your ceremony time, your guests will walk into an empty room of silence and wonder if they’ve arrived too early – or to the right place at all!

Pre-ceremony music also helps keep your ceremony on track to ensure all your special guests like grandparents, parents, etc. get seated correctly and that your big entrance isn’t overshadowed by Great-Aunt Sally waltzing in just as you’re about to walk down the aisle!

Tip: Hire ceremony musicians to play for 15 to 30 minutes prior to your ceremony start time.  Having them play before the ceremony gives guests the signal that it’s time to be seated. Have the musicians play for five to 15 minutes after the ceremony as ended as well, so your guests aren’t filing out in silence.

2. Don’t Choose A First Dance Song That’s Too Long

We’ve seen it happen again and again. The bride chooses a six minute song, and everyone is snoozing one minute in. Trust us, if you’re in front of a crowd, you’ll want it to be over quickly too.

Choose a song that’s meaningful to you and your new spouse, but do your best to keep it short. You’ll be glad you did, and your guests won’t lose focus either.

Be mindful when choosing father-daughter and mother-son dance songs as well. If you’ve got a live band, the nice thing is that they can cut a verse of the song or shorten it in a bunch of ways. Ask them to cut the song and send you a sample so you can still make sure it’s what you want for your moment in the spotlight.

Tip: Ask the band leader or DJ to get everyone on the dance floor and join you so that the party is ready to start as your song is winding down.

3. Your Music is Too Loud

You know that the music is too loud if you suddenly feel like you’ve stepped into a packed nightclub. Older guests may leave early if they can’t take the noise, and nobody can carry on a conversation over the thumping bass.

Communicate with all of your wedding music vendors at what level the volume should be for each part of your special day, including the ceremony, cocktail hour, dinner hour, first dances and the rest of the reception. Some professionals know how to make you r wedding day music an encompassing “crescendo,” playing most delicately from the beginning, and gradually bringing up tempo and volume as the evening progresses.

Tip: A great live band is able to adjust their volume during cocktail time and dinner. Sometimes your best bet may be to play pre-recorded music during those times. In some cases, a very raucous party is appropriate by the end of the evening, but be sure to check with your venue on any volume restrictions

4. The Band You Hired Only Plays One Genre

Who doesn’t love a good Cyndi Lauper rendition of “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”? Everyone is having a great time remembering the 80s, until you’ve heard enough and want to “Safety Dance” your way right out of your own reception. Make sure you hire entertainment that can accommodate many tastes and ages.

Tip: You can’t please everyone, but a good band or DJ with a large repertoire and lots of experience will take your reception to the next level.

5. Your DJ or Band Leader Hogs the Mic

After a long day of hair and makeup, taking pictures, tears of joy, and making vows, you’re ready to celebrate. The night is interrupted, however, because DJ or band leader feels the need to stop everything and give a monologue (or dialogue, which is even worse) about “you lovely people,” and the next song they’re going to play.

Make sure you communicate with your hired entertainment about how much you would like them to emcee and exactly what that means for your celebration.  If you don’t want them to give everyone a play-by-play, let them know.

Tip: If you have to be too specific with how much talking is too much talking, you’ve probably chosen the wrong wedding entertainment.

6. Your Guests Make Strange Song Requests (That You Don’t Want To Hear)

Somehow, regardless of the “do-not-play” list you gave the band or DJ a month ago, you keep hearing songs you don’t want to hear. While many professionals know not to take requests from just anyone, after a few drinks, guest can be pretty convincing!  In fact, “The bride said it was ok to request this!” has been heard by many a musician.

Make sure your reception entertainment knows who is calling the shots. 

Tip: If you are the bride or groom, it’s a good idea assign someone you trust to communicate with the band about music one the day of, but not your entire bridal party.

7. You Didn’t Hire the Band to Play Long Enough

Pictures, toasts, and formalities have eaten up tons of time at your reception and now there is only time for one hour of dancing, when you hired the band or DJ for three. When their contracted time is up, they are out, whether you’ve gotten your fill of music or not.

Consider hiring your band or DJ past your scheduled stop time, and make this call before your wedding day.  For example, if your reception is scheduled to end at 10 p.m., hire the wedding entertainment until 10:30.  Then, if the party is rocking and you don’t want to end, you’re not stuck with a fee you didn’t anticipate. 

Tip: In many cases, a band or DJ won’t even charge you for extra time if they know in advance.  However, if they’re asked at the last minute, you could pay thousands in overtime fees.

8. Music is Micromanaged

The band is just in the swing of things, dance floor is finally full and they stop to take a “scheduled” break. Give your band or DJ the flexibility to adjust to the crowd’s response.  If the dance floor is full, it’s best not to abruptly stop them to throw a bouquet. 

Your wedding is a celebration, not the Oscars. It’s OK if the “master schedule” is adjusted slightly for the sake of a good time.  Other than ceremony music and first dances, DJs and bands should have the creative freedom to play songs in an order that will compliment that particular part of the reception. 

Tip: Make a preferred list and a “do-not-play” list and leave the rest up to the professionals.